Shenanigans

End of October met beginning of November, another fine, eventful dates. Spent most of my hours at office and around the town, wandered through unfamiliar neighborhood with friends (streets, parks, etc. and somehow for solitary ramblings) and found some film ideas to execute with Bruda. Went to Instituto Italiano di Cultura to catch Europe Film Festival and currently listing down names of film I’m going to watch at iNAFF’09 (including Vincent Gallo’s Metropia).

Last Friday the Creative department had a gathering at our ECD’s. Practically, what he had pointed out was somehow a eye opener, not only that I’m (honestly) still a bit desperate to perform, I also still want to be around these people for longer while. Had a thought that the 45 minutes of eagerness enhancer would somehow be forgotten.. (no, not there yet!)

And most of it, we went to see Franz Ferdinand at Carnaval Beach. Despite the salty wetness of sea wind that got into your skin pores, it was really great. There were 3 venues, before they started, everybody rushed and filled into this one and got colossal mostly when song likes ‘Take me Out’ and ‘Do You Want To’ kicked in. Though I would enjoy more if the crowd kept moving without other songs being disposed, it’s just their third album is little known here. On one and only negative note: I was standing behind this ecstatically dancing ‘4L4y’ girl I meet at every gigs I went almost constantly (or fatefully). Whether she’s very multi-exist or she’s stalking on me.

I must thank Amang for showing me his book of Luis Sepulveda, ‘The Old Man Who Reads Love Stories’ it was translated to Bahasa but I found the translation is very fine and relevant, like how the nature of Sepulveda’s writing expressed in there. Making short of what I had from it, Ecuador is helluva paradise of sexy animals and good booze. Soon after that, I was recommended to read 2666 which I’m currently on page 300 something now.

Not only good things happened, had some frictions with someone I’m having kind of relationship with, still in same fashion of jocularity and dark humor, showing my innerchild, my disgusting egomaniacal disorder, my obsession for balance, including social standing and cash balance. As you see, living amidst the environment is full of award winning drama queens/kings/queers that forces me to define my own performance.. ha!

On high heels two days in a row doing manly job of carrying and installing photo panels. I’m thinking bout grooming.


This morning I took some photos of baby Annaya with Gun’s and Roses tees from me.

she has girly action on right pic!

Filed under: Uncategorized , Europe Film Festival, Franz Ferdinand, iNAFF

Young God/Bad Thing

full size

This morning story:
I was driving into road where wind rose in frenzy and cottons blown away. Outbreaks from kapok trees I was passing by, time tangled, head was light, mind was delirious. And I realized. It’s not autumn. It’s the onset of disaster.

I knew there would be a lot of late nights at the office. Since I’ve been ill, I dedicated the tedium to make some epiphany. Been a while not having affair with brushes and water color made this very rough and not finished tidily :/. So this was inspired by Edward Eke of The Pan I Am and Pan the God. Though I haven’t got any chance to see the live, I really go through every emotions of the live shows (thanks to internet, my technophobia tendency was cured). Materials: granted prayer from Pan the God, frictions of bones, soupy zinc sensation of red blood watercolor. Next one is ‘Clarisa’, my reunion project of our design class. Oh I’m starting another project at this fashion magazine as a contributor :D! Psst don’t tell my bosses.

Oh, it’s 20 October. Happy anniversary to little moi, Arthur Rimbaud, Bela Lugosi, and Snoop Dogg (??).

So my official and unofficial works are going mental (I’m surprised at how many works I’m handling simultaneously), but I’m filled with gratitude today: mailbox full of birthday greetings (just like job requests), mobile phone was crashed too, cakes/gifts/surprises every now and then (yes! so with the creative briefs). I’ve been terrorized with sweetness. Thank you. *snob time over*
Being 23 is not so bad.
Oh, I’m so young, so goddamn.
Set me free.. (Patti Smith)

Bella gave me Mini Diana!

Filed under: art, music , art, Edward Eke, illustration, lomography, mini Diana, The Pan I am

Quintessential Counterspy

Been suffering growing pains for the whole week. First is heavy cold. Half deaf, sluggish and overdosed, I though the last earthquake was side effect or another thing made by HAARP

Then I was made aware that I’ve got ridiculous amount of RAW files to work on. Last week I did a pre wedding photoshoot for my friend Helga. The couple was agreed with the idea I proposed. I was inspired by 30-40s espionage, and Newseum Cafe at Veteran Street (where we previously did screenplay writing and discussion) it is, definitely. It’s an alternative room of cafe, art gallery, also legendary hideout place of Mata Hari where she studied Indonesian culture. I like the irony, where optimism was used as a counter-balanced of the great depression/post-war ambience of pessimism. Just like how they produced some musicals and comedies to entertain themselves. The zeitgeist: undercover, optimism, betterment, hope, mission, travel, togetherness, harmony, 30-40s spy, agent, etc.

In execution, I want the shots not perfectly lit, or ‘beautifully’ low-key. I want them to be just make sense. Not composed. I hate to say that I wanted me and my camera to be sincere (let’s say: redemption, because we’ve been such liars). And that’s the feel I got from Newseum Cafe. Like the era, they have this little cranny highlights and vignette in the corners. With the presence of dead areas, some of the image appears more alive. I also done the props and wardrobe, helped by Stella and Mira.

Just a leak from unedited stuffs. To avoid Frank Miller-ish look I will make it like less gloomy version of film noir (imagine the photos standing amid the flowers in the wedding day).

Filed under: art, photography , DOMUS, espionage, Mata Hari, Newseum Cafe, photography

Folkloric Holiday in Medan

Ages ago was a small village, been used for trading, gambling, and tobacco plantation before then established as a town post during the Dutch colonialism. But from what I just saw, the capital of North Sumatra is still affluent as business area while keeping its classic value, like Becak (pedicab) and the good food.


Monasteries (विहार). I took some picture when visiting the old town along Jalan A Yani, the city’s historic core (very Braga and Kota Tua-like).

The legendary mansion of Tjong A Fie.
There’s a sentiment regarding the bad blood of Medan-Chinese behavior in doing business. Amuses me somehow that we’re such a nation rich of ethnic legacies, as well as the negative characters.

The country side I took while on the road going to Pantai Cermin (Mirror Beach). They have funny looking houses with such sense of pastel colors I love so much.

Our folkloric holiday lasted four days (me, Mom and sister), we stayed at Mami’s (my Aunt), the most powerful woman in Medan. Mami has a son and twin daughters (everything’s doubled up: two shower hoses, custom 2.5 x 2 m bed, etc.) and we played music, chatted and laughed a lot.. It was a very lovely stay, we could hear crickets orchestra at night and people reciting sad Batak song at Malacca Strait.

Music I listened to: Euros Childs – Son of Euro Child, The Waterboys – Best Of, Andrew Bird – Noble Beast, and Bob Dylan – Blood on the Tracks

The devastating Sumatra earthquake photos. I remember when Tsunami hit Aceh in 2005, I wished I were there and could die with them.

Filed under: history, photography, travel , earthquake, Medan, Padang, Sumatra, Tjong A Fie, travel, vihara

Hari Kunzru at Salihara

I came to the reading at Salihara (it’s a very nice place) to see Hari Kunzru (lovely site, you can read his short stories there). The discussion was about radicalism and multi identity. I went there with my friend after a radio ad recording. It was very interesting despite small things that cranked me a bit, that I was late, and in the discussion I had this question got hijacked by a famous pop novelist (was nothing intelligent, I had this secret motive of coming home with my ‘My Revolutions’ got signed because I can’t make it to Ubud Writers and Readers Festival to meet those world caliber writers). Basically on how and why did he occupy through 60s romanticism in his book, leading to the cultural multi identity issue. Then we went to National Heroes Park to grab some late night meal and discussed this mad existential topic and ends throwing sad jokes about our quarter life crisis. So typical, so personal.

Filed under: Uncategorized

Childhood

The truly inventive realm you ever inhabit. The world of imagination, the all year around springtime, the caring freedom, all that can form you a tear in the corner of the eye. Yes I’m a sap. I found photo albums at my Aunty’s that gave a glimpse back to early 90’s when I was this adorable little moi. Mom told me funny things about how I spent too much time spacing out, how I often got bullied by my brother, lost, of left (once when I was sleeping with Teddy Roosevelt-eh-Bear inside the hotel room’s cupboard in Perth). These are some photos of ours (there are my cousins and aunty).

Can I have that red overall, shirt and boots now?
Random. Really simple and sweet animation:

Filed under: Uncategorized

Ignoramus Generation

Had a chat with fellow culturatis (cut the Thesaurus lingo) about things that have been haunting my nights. Though I felt meaningless to voice up and what I did was just being a sad smartass (and got easily pleased by it). There were little frictions between my generation and another ones above us (and poor me, they’re all experienced writers/actor/director). Anyway the topic was all about where we are. Like, how many people in Indonesia know where the name ‘Indonesia’ derived from? Defining about the difference between continent people and agrarians (was all in my college study, I remembered Pak Prim, one of those who’ve made one of the big impact in my life). From there, without wanting it to sound ambitious/heroism but now I’m gathering friends for ‘Nusantara’ project after I finished reading Sutasoma. I lost my words now.. will write again later. Give you hibiscus for now. I have many of them.

(continued on 12 September) Every generation owns a spirit that will go where it wills. And I don’t even dare to define mine. Seriously, this is a lame subject, cause it just comes upon individuals. But looking at the layered and mixed perspectives, we seem like a ‘no culture youth’, suffering the symptom of political failure. We have such a pity consideration to value our culture. Say, the local clothing movement had been great until we find imported commercial artworks printed on every store corners. Not merely plagiarism, look at the overpriced batik in malls, do our craftmen got decent royalties? We’re uncontrollably directed toward instant matters to the bone, the mentality (that makes us become inaffectual youths). It’s so hard to feel confident about our culture. It’s so hard to be honest, to be not superficial. Indonesia-Malaysia cultural war was a great stimulus, but after so much fun of patriotic swearing and spitspatting (I’ve been hating my friends for doing stuffs), then it’s just forgotten. No action taken. Pardon my screwed up English but my wry sense of nationalism is just the same nonsense.

This though just popped because lately I’ve been researching about youth brands characteristic and it kinda brought me back to college years (it’s not like years ago, i graduated just last year). Those idealistic ideas and thought, ‘This will be wonderful! I’m gonna be a part of something big, something great!’  I missed it. We acted gipsy camp, got high with self delusions and adolescence illusions, all the senseless folly! How I envy the hippies. They made their own culture, music, their attitude, etc. Also the libertines.. perhaps aesthetically, if not ethically. So with such hopes and dreams I waited for inspiration and chance to come (which is never). Many things are before me, but with all the hype, it’s enough to be just aware about it, I don’t seek them out. I wanted to be subculture generalist. Then I’d become much interested to rebellion until it suddenly made no sense. I wanted to quickly graduate college and paid for free to make some award winning ads make money from a career in advertising making mainstream commercial ads. There, I said it.

And just soon I realized that circa my college-office bridging how passion made me a bitter person. I’d abandoned simple spontaneous pleasures for ‘competition’. The environment  I’d been flung into taught me to be uneasily pleased pretentious selfish. Kind of Übermensch ideal which restrained me from exploring more on my creative side/productivity. I’ve became ultra over calculated, and that my thoughts end in decimal (a thing I was countered of, tho I said nothing wrong with that). This train of thoughts, the tight deadline, reshaped my conceptual of being a youth. I feel so old with my sceptical perception on passion, whilst I’m just an advertising neophyte. That’s just funny.

So.. I feel like having a big leap to get out of this not likely mine field. I’m planning out to go outside the country to seek a practical knowledge, share a culture, art, language. I wanna put it on a test. Without running away from responsibility, I wanna know what would it be if i live my own way. Europe sounds nice.

But I’m so skint.

Filed under: Uncategorized

Pardon me.

We all know that internet is the best place to cheat. It can be something that screws your morning that will consistently screw your whole day.

Today I’ve got this seller’s message in my eBay inbox saying that the item I just won and paid has lost in ‘burglary’ and apparently he sent the refund right away (meaning: giving no chance for me to respond). On the other side, yes, the seller did refund the payment. But is there anything that can compensate disappointment?!

My hunches: the price didn’t meet him, contacted the other bidder (or other way around) to win over my price and ʞɔnɟ with the item, so there’s no concern to be resolved (since I received my refund), and then closed the deal!
Ha! How I feel sympathy with this serendipitous burglary.

This stolen/deus ex machina plot is tricky because you can’t suspend the account and asking the seller revert to the resolve center to show any proof (like broken item). Well, you can put a feedback or comment to the seller profile, but careful with this, he might hit you back with negative feedback because officially he did nothing against the rules. I somehow wish that I could track this someone, anyone, and drag this greedy little skint to hell. There’s a lot of person like that. And the first thing you can do is: bitching, swearing, and chanting an instant bad karma:

“What you send into the Universe, is ALWAYS returned THREEFOLD.“
Of course I’m joking about the last one. Ah well. Finished now with my emotional disclosure.
I. just. want. to be. Spock.
Meh :\

Filed under: Uncategorized , ebay

Saturday Screenplay

Though I had been scheduled ‘Screenwriting’ into my writing life long before, it’s the right time that finally came in. I’m doing it now yay. Harmlessly saying, most of Indonesian big screen movies are poor and lack of crafting. And nothing’s necessary to blame since it’s reciprocal to our ‘made up’ market. Would be funny to explain that I start the whole things simply to see it ends up and shaped into a movie. Not as deep as another wry amusement of patriotism.

Our second meeting was held yesterday and so for the next four weeks to discuss every progress of each scripts. It’s (mbak) Sekar Ayu Asmara who helped us delivering the whole screenplay things, with the spirit of her bold, idealistic, piercing opinion about the industry’s bitter truth and working ethic. Considering the multi creative field she’s working on with such achievements, how can I disagree to respect her as an aspiring person.

So the class went amazing that I quickly made up lot of to do list on top of everything in my mind. I’m tempted that screenwriting is truly challenging. I thought I was attentive enough about it everytime I watch a movie. But this time it should be done deliberately, not mere as entertainment. As soon as I got back, I hurriedly knocked myself into the bookshelf, slipped inside the blanket like baby, re-reading Sigmund Freud to make a multidimentional character 8D and such things. And the quick plan is: research and type and tweak and forth.

I like the way it gave me chance for new practical contact in creative writing. Let’s say-another recreation, boredom surpassing, from bunch of explorative routines: radio/TVC script, fiction, poem or even song lyric! O spicy thing.

Anyway,
My car has been pulling off a noisy sound for a week. I made a plan with this mechanic guy after the class but since couldn’t get to him on the phone, instead I dropped by mall with Elfit and bought this white slim Miss Selfridge. Size 6s. Ssh! Help me to stay low. After all those tremor terrors of  weightloss, my mind has been suitably delicate again. Like the yoga, I feel more balance with desirelessness. I cut the ‘intake adjustment’ cause in technique I was concerned that it’s quite unexpected losing that amount of kilos in 3 weeks. And since it isn’t shape what I’m after, more like vacant ambition. I was also concerned my lack of estrogen would get severe without meat supply. lol. Well, I won’t kill all my good cells if it wasn’t to aid creativity (crap, this word is overused while we’re actually abused and rejected when applying it to any form of life. haha)
Quote of the day: ‘Stay healthy is diet bluff’

Filed under: movie, writing , film Indonesia, fiximix, layar lebar, Miss Selfridge, movie screenplay, screenwriting, Sekar Ayu Asmara

The Middle Against the Both Sides

1984 is one of my favorite political books despite its bit of patronizing, dry delivery. And I believe the meaning might possibly change as I age, like Animal Farm which I had read times like (say, say, not without feeling cross-eyed, self-doubt). I felt a stale attraction at Orwell’s romanticism, in this case where he described the love scene between Winston and Julia, the scenery setting and all. Needed time to feel sure that it’s what inside the mind of people in 40s (mostly as a product of late 80s, dark ages, where music and fashion had been great then sucked and gone great again lol). Some examination on related history made it plausible. In 1984, Emmanuel Goldstein’s ‘Oligarchical Collectivism’ exposes this dystopian system of ‘corporate communism’ or capitalism and communism being mixed up. That makes me assumed 1984 as a fiction is neither a condemnation to communism nor capitalism failures.

1984-George Orwell, Animal Farm-George Orwell (design by Shepard Fairey), and Snowball’s Chance-John Reed

As it ages, it’s inevitable for such great idea not to face ideology clash, like what John Reed has done in his Snowball’s Chance (Orwell’s Animal Farm parody). I actually haven’t read the book yet, but I’m attracted to all the reviews. Having all the great ideas stolen by people from the past, ‘hard to be original’ is the best excuse. How we pleased with the cultural movements with all their authenticities that dwell on the past. Nowadays, you make a parody out of one remarkable work and there you go, strikingly win the big business pitch. This kind of work might be radical, and actual, but factual? Of course we don’t need that in fictional world *sways hand*. Reed gained so much praises by his interpretation towards Orwell’s work as a condemnation to ideology system which portrayed in Animal Farm.
Of Snowball’s Chance as a follow-up to Orwell’s work, Reed stated: “My intention is to blast Orwell, I’m really doing my best to annihilate him.”[1] (wikipedia).
But my my subjective opinion, Reed’s ‘annihilation’ is not enough to bring Orwell’s reputation in disgrace (Orwell’s ideology, wheter he’s a democratic socialist or whatever) because basically, a story comes in a form of imitation of the author’s experience and event (in this case: Orwell’s participation in the Civil War long before he wrote both Animal Farm, 1984, or Homage to Catalonia).

For the utopia that 19th century inherited you, don’t be surprise that in 21st century you only have a satire humor. The reason for me not to choose between the two is because my cheapskateness doesn’t have place anywhere. Undeniable that literature exchanges effects with civilization in all cultural territory: art and society. But it’s basic that society always cling on era, timeliness and certain events, thus we always look for a period of significant enjoyment, and develop it with the most actual things at the moment. They walk together on a path of revolution, either it has over or perpetual.

As I thought about literature that walks side by side with the quality of civilization, there had been this polemic in my country between the Lekra (socialist realism) and Manikebu (universal humanism). So impactful that it’s then produced many interpretants/audiences even more than the great names behind it, even wider than just the contrast between proletarians and bourgeouis. It was the era of communism, revolution, and its condemnation in my country. For me it’s like natural attraction for a cultural history that has contradiction rich of interpretation, where literature noticed as a beautiful, age-proof, timeless piece.

Sekitar Polemik Pramoedya-Lekra VS Manikebu-A.Kohar Ibrahim

Filed under: book, history, literature , 1984, Animal Farm, George Orwell, John Reed, Lekra, literature, Manikebu, Sastra Indonesia